Thursday, March 18, 2004

I'm feeling a little frustrated right now, because I wish there were two of me. One of me to attend to my regular daily life, and one of me who'd get to play with all the tempting boys and girls who are throwing themself in my path lately. (These would be personal partners, not clients.)

There's the sweetest little dark-haired girl (Okay, she's thirty, but she has a very girlish air about her...) that I've played with twice, and I'd like to do it again, but Jesus, I have no time. To be fair to myself, she's pretty busy too. But there are just so many scrumptious people that I don't dare let myself get involved with, because I really don't want to hurt their feelings when I don't have time to see them on any kind of regular basis.

I know, I know - it's a nice problem to have, isn't it? Too many cute potential partners and not enough time for them all. Sucks to be me, I know. And it isn't as if my daily life is boring drudgery, either - quite the opposite! I love what I do for a living, I'm getting some nice attention to my column, and my other writing is going very well.

But I do get frustrated sometimes, because I can remember a time in my life - oh, ten years ago - when I had oodles of time for different partners. Of course, I don't want to give up all the things I'm doing now that are taking up all that previously-free time. Greedy, aren't I? It's part of my charm.
I tell myself that life goes in cycles and I'm just in a very busy career/creative cycle right now, and in time the wheel will spin and I'll have more space in my life for secondary/play partners.

But it's damn hard to wait.

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